by John Wesley
Self confidence is the difference between feeling unstoppable and feeling scared out of your wits. Your perception of yourself has an enormous impact on how others perceive you. Perception is reality 〞 the more self confidence you have, the more likely it is you＊ll succeed.
Although many of the factors affecting self confidence are beyond your control, there are a number of things you can consciously do to build self confidence. By using these 10 strategies you can get the mental edge you need to reach your potential.
1. Dress Sharp
Although clothes don＊t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don＊t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and shaving frequently, wearing clean clothes, and being cognizant of the latest styles.
This doesn＊t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is ※spend twice as much, buy half as much§. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes. Buying less also helps reduce the clutter in your closet.
2. Walk Faster
One of the easiest ways to tell how a person feels about herself is to examine her walk. Is it slow? tired? painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren＊t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.
3. Good Posture
Similarly, the way a person carries herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They aren＊t enthusiastic about what they＊re doing and they don＊t consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you＊ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You＊ll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.
4. Personal Commercial
One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech. Unfortunately, opportunities to listen to a great speaker are few and far between. You can fill this need by creating a personal commercial. Write a 30-60 second speech that highlights your strengths and goals. Then recite it in front of the mirror aloud (or inside your head if you prefer) whenever you need a confidence boost.
5. Gratitude
When you focus too much on what you want, the mind creates reasons why you can＊t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum. You＊ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success.
6. Compliment other people
When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you＊ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.
7. Sit in the front row
In schools, offices, and public assemblies around the world, people constantly strive to sit at the back of the room. Most people prefer the back because they＊re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You＊ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.
8. Speak up
During group discussions many people never speak up because they＊re afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. This fear isn＊t really justified. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you＊ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.
9. Work out
Along the same lines as personal appearance, physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you＊re out of shape, you＊ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physcial appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive. Having the discipline to work out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.
10. Focus on contribution
Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus too much on ourselves and not enough on the needs of other people. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you＊re making to the rest of the world, you won＊t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase self confidence and allow you to contribute with maximum efficiency. The more you contribute to the world the more you＊ll be rewarded with personal success and recognition.
佳: 我认为文章写的很好，上面的一些评论也很多都不错
我呢，...
小晖晖: 自2010年开始，我小晖晖将在以后的每时每刻都自信着！......
wangami: 自信首先来自于个人内心的平衡，楼上的朋友也有提到有时超自信，...
恢复中的人: 我很喜欢这个网站，培养适度的自信，过和不及都是错误的
冰点: 这只是理论知识,我们只有在实践中慢慢体会,才能做到一个自信的...
直到永远: 我一定会在大2之前找到自信，谢谢作者给我一个盖造我自己的机会...
Yuki: 在杂志上看过另一篇关于如何建立自信的文章，那篇文章说，自新的...
范:2007-08-12 22:24 PM
我对自信和自卑完全不自知
让我坐第一排或是最后一排 我完全没有不同的感觉
xukelly:2007-08-13 14:15 PM
学一下吧,我觉得自己就是不够自信,很有参考价值.
Bella:2007-08-13 20:49 PM
自信的人看这些文章就相信自己可以通过这些方式得到自信;
不自信的人就不相信自己可以通过这些方式提高自信,我的看法
我觉得最重要的还是提高自己吧,
当能力超出平均值时自然就自信了
huanghuang:2007-08-15 0:19 AM
自己都不相信自己你还相信什么！谁还相信你！自信是人的脊梁骨！
我认为文章写的很好，上面的一些评论也很多都不错
我呢，是大学毕业都一年了还像个单纯的不懂得人情世故的小学生，用我男朋友说我是典型的自负加自卑型的女孩子，以前是，我有时候非常自信，所有的困难都能克服的感觉，此时他就说我是自负；有时候遇到不顺利的事情时，我又会表现的对一切都有些畏惧，这时候就是自卑了。
不过我很庆幸有他一直在我身边，在我自负时提醒我，在我自卑时鼓励我，现在他对我的评价是越来越自信了，我自我感觉也是自信多了，比以前也成熟一点了，在此我非常感谢他，也更爱他 了！
所以，我建议目前不是很自信的朋友，身边也找一个真正的朋友帮你一起建立起自信！不管你是性格温柔还是豪爽都会成为自信的人！
pursuit:2007-08-15 16:26 PM
真的很符合!我也算是个自信的人
婷:2007-08-16 15:04 PM
我是一个没有自信的女孩,从小就不爱表现自己.每次我发言老师总会说声音大点,有一次跳舞我在前面叫口号紧张的脸上都抽筋拉.今年暑假去一家公司应聘问我问提时我脑子一片空白.
其实每次这种情况下我都对自己说有什么好怕的,不就是你来公司的理由、目的吗?别人都不怕我怕什么?可是每次自我安稳都没效果.我还觉得我心理素质很差,帮帮我我该怎样做?
Zoey:2007-08-16 15:57 PM
正在建立自信
Ares:2007-08-19 16:08 PM
那张图片绝了～
ghfgv:2007-08-20 9:48 AM
很好的啊，我支持
7777777:2007-08-22 11:41 AM
贴太好了，我顶下！
星之夭夭:2007-08-24 12:51 PM
收藏了
树的回忆:2007-08-25 23:16 PM
真的很感谢这片文章，在我正感到无助，彷徨，害怕，自卑时，仿佛让我看到阳光．．
我会培养我的自信，明天的面试我一定会成功的．．．
Guest:2007-08-26 10:27 AM
自信是需要坚持的 不是说说而已
Lynn.:2007-08-26 19:09 PM
是啊,我也很支持这篇文章.
我们都应该自信起来.
没什么值得我们感觉那么卑微.
自信的人是最美丽的,我们能认识到自己的弱点.
并且希望改正,我们也是美丽的,不是吗.
所以我们都要+U+U.
行动起来吧,充实自己.
美丽自信的公主:2007-08-26 22:02 PM
很同意上面的一些说法,外表在一定程度上可以让我觉得自己也很有魅力,因魅力而自信,其实你还是你,只是外表让你有勇气..
自信应该是内外兼修的,外表的关注和内心的充实才是永恒自信的保证
hy:2007-08-27 13:47 PM
我不知到以上的方法是否能增加自信
这只是理论知识,我们只有在实践中慢慢体会,才能做到一个自信的人!记得一位心理老师曾说过”一个不自信的人,是一个心理不健康的人!其实也是,所谓自信,也就是你自己必须要相信自己,如果连自己都不相信自己了,谁还会相信你!这就如同”想要得到别人的尊重,自己必须要尊重自己,自己都不尊重自己,谁还会尊重你”再想想,不自信的理由,那就是自卑了!为什么要自卑呢?残疾人都那么坚强,我们不缺胳膊不缺腿的,别人能做到的我们为什么做不到?”所以说,要让自己自信起来,首先要改变自己的观念!正所谓,思想决定行为嘛!
朋友们!让我们共同努力吧!
勇者:2007-08-29 17:39 PM
确实不错,我也是一个不怎么自信的人，看了这篇文章,我会更加自信的,心动加行动等于成功
hhyapdhqcom:2007-08-30 10:29 AM
自信是人生的起点，是一切的开始？没有自信，就没有目标？
easolg jlviept:2007-08-30 16:05 PM
yuvfgo qmwntrdph juoyrtahl xdaipmlf iydsb jxemzqsg bwvxghf
尘:2007-08-30 21:41 PM
许久没来这坐坐了。
很喜欢看到自信的光芒，我相信我可以的!
Guest:2007-08-31 11:48 AM
容易紧张怎么办呢
遇到不一样的人群就紧张
都不知道说什么好
？？？？？？？？？
﹎(_泙荇綫oo:2007-09-04 10:22 AM
有些人自信到自负，有些人不自信到回避，为什么会有如此大的反差？我觉得外貌以及体形还是重要的，至少它们是能够让我们自信起来的原材料。自信最有魅力，我很相信这句话。自信让自己的生活没有压力。
﹎(_泙荇綫oo:2007-09-04 10:25 AM
我想到这个贴吧的人，都是在找那个自信的自己。大家一起加油！
改变自我:2007-09-05 11:24 AM
自卑的人就不自爱 不自尊
kidann:2007-09-07 10:38 AM
过分的那么做只会让人觉得你是个傲慢的人
建立自信必须要首先学会平和的欣赏自己和他人
及时肯定自己的小成果
簌簌风清:2007-09-08 14:41 PM
说的很好啊，我要试着做一做
程序员:2007-09-09 19:12 PM
呵呵。我从小的座右铭就是“相信自己”，但真正能做到又何其难。
凡人:2007-09-19 10:12 AM
谢谢了！！！
wdw:2007-09-22 22:10 PM
相信自己，超越自己，才是建立自信的唯一途径！！
Confidence:2007-09-24 7:35 AM
self-confidence= experience
Guest:2007-09-24 19:07 PM
思想再好,它总是虚幻的,只有行动才能把思想变为现实!
归根到底还是行动,行动,在行动,…..
Guest:2007-09-24 19:07 PM
思想再好,它总是虚幻的,只有行动才能把思想变为现实!
smile:2007-09-25 12:43 PM
我是一个不自信的人 在工作中 特别是在领导岗位 总也做不好事情 或许我该按照文章所说的去做试试看
芝芝~:2007-09-26 15:01 PM
上面的建议都不错，都是使人在潜因默化中找回信心，信心不是一天、两天培养出来的，它是一种习惯，一种品质，是需要人通过内化，将其融汇贯通展现出来。
我有时也缺乏自信，我会采纳一些，感谢有这样的文章～～
zhen feng:2007-09-29 4:30 AM
我会努力找回自信！！！
也要勇敢面对这美好的世界！！！
猪猪:2007-09-30 17:36 PM
你来到 世界 都已经很不错了,所以要珍惜老天爷赐予你的这次机会,人生只有一次.要好好的把握.你是独一无二的,也是最可爱的.只要做最好的自己.世界会留一条精彩的路给你走/不怕困难,勇往直前.积极向上/保持自己的个性.成绩不能说明一切,能力才是关键/相信自己吧!你可以的!
无自信的我:2007-10-01 15:51 PM
我感觉基本上都和我一些情况差不多，我会试着做做的。但说到走路快，我有点怀疑啊
xiang:2007-10-03 17:52 PM
你行我也行/自信的人能战胜一切。相信自己没有理由。
小松:2007-10-04 17:04 PM
自信说简单就简单，说难也难。文章说的有道理，试试也不错，但是最重要的是勇敢。我在努力。自信与外表有很大关系。“自信的人最美”自信的人最有魅 力。
小松:2007-10-04 17:04 PM
自信说简单就简单，说难也难。文章说的有道理，试试也不错，但是最重要的是勇敢。我在努力。自信与外表有很大关系。“自信的人最美”自信的人最有魅 力。
狼狼:2007-10-06 14:42 PM
我以前试过，感觉累。好象内心对自我的肯定最重要。我也不知道怎样才能建立自信。在摸索中。我们共同努力吧！
蜗牛の蓝天:2007-10-06 22:26 PM
自信是要一点点建立的！
要不断去塑造自信的自己~~~
加油~~~ ^_^
对:2007-10-07 20:15 PM
同意行动 行动 再行动~！没有比行动更有说服力了~！
对:2007-10-07 20:18 PM
没有人能帮自己，说得再多也没用，一切靠自己。
sunday:2007-10-08 21:45 PM
看起来很有用。我也是一个自卑的人，从现在开始我也要努力成为一个自信的人！！！自卑的伙伴，大家一齐加油！
江上清风:2007-10-11 13:51 PM
我就爱坐在前面，并且毫无拘束之感。我也不在穿着方面跟潮流，只穿自己喜欢和适合自己的，这就是自信。很可怜的是有些女同胞，盲目赶时髦，外表时髦其实内心脆弱，没有自信、没有主见，何来美丽？！
江上清风:2007-10-11 13:53 PM
真正的自信是一种平和，就象上面有位朋友说的，坐在第一和最后排是一样的，不是他麻木，是因为他自信。
释:2007-10-15 19:52 PM
加我啊 一起讨论
我来说两句