许多人每天都会做出令人讨厌的行为，他们并非是沟通技能上的缺陷，也不是无法改变的性格障碍；但这些恶习不是发生在真空中的，只有当人与人之间进行互动的时候，你才能体会到这些行为所带来的影响。培训师Marshall总结了人们在工作生活常见的20种恶习，不妨来对照一下，您占了几席？每个人都自己克服恶习的独特方法，如果您有过成功经验，欢迎一起来分享探讨。-psytopic.com
常见的20个恶习，你占了几个？
以下是Marshall(全球高级领导者教练领域的先驱与权威)总结的在工作生活中常见20个恶习，具体来说，这些行为包括：
● 求胜欲太强：在任何情况下都要不惜一切代价去打败对方，无论这样做是否值得。
● 太喜欢增加价值: 每次讨论的时候总要发表一番自己的高见。
● 太喜欢点评：总是要对别人的说法评论一番，把自己的标准强加于人。
● 总是发表破坏性评论：总是为了让自己的言语听起来更深刻、更诙谐而说出一些不必要的讥讽之语。
● 喜欢用“不”“但是”或“可是”来开头：过多地使用否定式过渡语，实际上是在告诉对方，“你错了，我才是对的”。
● 告诉世界你有多聪明：总是要告诉周围的人我比他们想象的更聪明。
● 乱发脾气：经常在愤怒的时候跟人沟通，把情绪上的波动不加约束地传导出去。
● 负面思维，比如“让我来告诉你这样做为什么不行”：总是要用自己的负面思维去影响周围的人—即使是在毫无必要的时候。
● 隐瞒信息：为了让自己占有一定的心理优势而拒绝跟别人分享信息。
● 不懂得表示认可：不懂得表扬或奖励别人。
● 喜欢抢功：总是过于高估自己在某项工作中的作用。这是最让人厌恶的一种恶习。
● 总是喜欢找借口：总是把自己的坏习惯归结为某种无法改变的原因，以此来为自己的行为开脱。
● 把一切都归咎于过去：总是把自己的失误或缺点归咎于以往的人或事。其实是在为自己的过失寻找替罪羊。
● 偏袒下属：不能公正地对待自己周围的人。
● 拒绝道歉：拒绝为自己的行为承担责任，拒绝承认错误，不承认自己的行为影响到了其他人。
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● 不懂得聆听：对同事最不礼貌的一种表现。
● 不懂得感激：最缺乏礼貌的一种坏习惯。
● 惩罚报信人：错误地攻击那些本来想要帮助你的人。
● 乱找替罪羊：总是把自己的过失推到其他人头上。
● 过于强调自我：把自己身上那些无法改正的缺点看成是一种美德，总是强调“我就是这样一个人”。
或许尼科洛 · 马基雅维利会把这些坏习惯看成是一种美德，并告诉人们该如何利用这些恶习来打败对手。但作者显然不这么认为。
值得庆幸的是，这些恶习很少会同时出现在一个人身上。更让人高兴的是，这些恶习大都非常容易克服。举个例子，要想克服“不懂得感激”的恶习，你只要记得经常说“谢谢你”就可以了；要想克服“不会道歉”的恶习，你只要记得经常说“对不起，下次我会做得更好”就可以了；等等。这些方法看起来非常简单，它就像系鞋带、骑自行车，或者其他类似的生活技巧那样简单。可即便如此，我们还是会对生活中可以用到这些技巧的机会视而不见，以致慢慢变得生疏。
每个人都自己克服恶习的独特方法，如果您有过成功克服恶习的经验，不妨在评论中和我们分享。
作者：Marshall Goldsmith
本文来自《Knowledge at Wharton》，由《纽约时报》和Grand China Publishing House提供中文简体字版权，发布于《经理人》2009年第5期。 
Every day many people make is to discuss
Repulsive behavior, they are not communicating
Deficiencies in skills, nor is it can not be
Changes in personality disorders; but these evil
Learning does not happen in a vacuum, and only
When there is interaction between people
, You can realize that these lines
For the impact. Trainer
Marshall summed up the people in the workplace
20 kinds of common life of bad habits, it may
To control you, you account for a few seats?
Everyone of their own to overcome the bad habits
Special methods, if you have had success by
Inspection, please share to explore together. --
psytopic.com
20 common bad habits, do you account for
A few?
The following is a Marshall (global high -
Coach-class leader and a pioneer in the field
The authority of) the work of summing up life in the often
See 20 bad habits, in particular, this
These acts include:
● To win, too: in any
Circumstances must at all costs to
Beat each other, regardless of whether or not to do so
Worth.
● increase the value of love: each
The total time for discussion to make a self -
Own opinions.
● too fond Comments: always
Comment on other people's view about it, the
Impose their own standards.
● always devastating assessment released
On: Always order for their own words
It sounds more profound, more witty to say
Ridiculed some unnecessary words.
● like to use "no" to "But
Yes "or" but "to the beginning: too much
The use of negative language of transition, in fact,
Is to tell the other side, "you are wrong, I
Is right. "
● How do you tell the world cong
That: always want to tell people around me
More than they thought wise.
● arbitrary temper: often in anger
Anger when communicating with people, the emotional
The fluctuations are not bound to the conduction
去.
● negative thinking, such as "Let me
To tell you to do so why not
Line ": always use their own negative thinking
Victoria to influence people around - even the
At a time when there is no need to.
● conceal information: In order for self -
Has possession of a certain psychological advantage to refuse
Must share information with others.
● do not know how to express recognition: No
Other people know how to praise or reward.
● grab like Gong: always too
Overestimation of their own work for a
Used. This is one of the most offensive
Bad habits.
● always like to find an excuse: the total
Is to attribute their own bad habits for a
Kinds of reasons that can not be changed in order to
For their own acts.
● been attributed to everything
To: always to their own mistakes or lack of
人或事attributed to the previous point. Its
It is their own fault for looking for
The crime of sheep.
● protecting their subordinates: You can not just
To treat their own people around.
● refused to apologize for: refusing to self -
Responsible for the acts of others, refused to bid
Identify errors, do not recognize their own behavior
Affects the others.
● do not know how to listen: colleagues
A manifestation of the most impolite.
● do not know how to appreciate: the lack of
Courtesy of a bad habit.
● messenger punish people: wrongly
Attack those who want to help your
People.
● chaos to find a scapegoat: always
Fault of their own to the other poll
On.
● too much emphasis on the self: the self -
Has been found to correct the shortcomings of those who are unable to
Seen as a virtue, always strong
Tune, "I was such a person."
Perhaps尼科洛马基雅维
Lee will be looking into these bad habits as a
Kinds of virtues, and to tell people how to
Use of these bad habits to defeat the opponent.
However, the author obviously does not think so.
Fortunately, these evil
Learning seldom appear in a person at the same time
Body. Even more pleased that this
Some are very easy to overcome bad habits.
For example, in order to overcome the "do not know how to
Grateful for "the bad habits, do you remember as long as
Used to say "Thank you" will be a; to
Would like to overcome the "no apology" to the bad habits
As long as you remember always say, "Sorry,
I will do better next time "can
A; and so on. These methods seem to
Very simple, it just系鞋带,
Riding a bicycle, or other similar
As simple as life skills. May even
Nevertheless, we still have life
These techniques can be used as the opportunity to
But not so slowly becoming Health
Sparse.
Everyone to overcome their bad habits
Unique approach, if you have been into
Gong experience to overcome bad habits, we might as well
Comments and share with us.
Author: Marshall Goldsmith
This article from the "Knowledge at
Wharton ", from" New York
Reported "and the Grand China
Chinese Publishing House to provide
Copyright in simplified Chinese characters, published in the "manager
Person "in 2009, No. 5.
suggest a better translation.
sky: 恩，讲得不错，希望以后慢慢改正~
湜（莪芣蓜）: 我其实也有几条 怎么改啊??? 寻求帮助!!!!!!1
小烈焰: 我感染了赌，现在输了很多，我想戒，但戒不掉。
每次输了都说...
18凝月: 我去包容她的错误，因为我喜欢她。她为了我去努力做个好学生，但...
凝视你的褐瞳: 试问，前面的些朋友，你们都用心悔改嚒？还是心血来潮？要想改掉...
pentery: 放宽心态。
萧萧雨寒: 我的坏习惯就是习惯一个人躲在角落，最好别人不要注意到我的存在...
说得很好,每个人都有自己缺点,聪明的人会清醒地认识到自己的缺点并很好地改正!
廖氏闲人:2009-07-02 8:18 AM
看来我是有了很多个恶习了，居然连最后面一个我都有了，真是太失败了，希望各位多多评论，发表自己的看法。我可能是不想去改变现状吧，才会导至现在这样，我很喜欢发表一些破坏性的评论，不知这个怎么克服？多给点建议！
说得很好，陋习总是难以自省自查的，首先认识到它们就是一种进步
我有很多 不知道如何改正
好像我看到这些恶习其实只有一个：过于自我，或是佛家所说的“我执”，也许读一些佛经会有帮助呢。谁知道呢！
左派的空虚:2009-07-02 21:44 PM
看了，我的缺点很多 恶习也不少，女朋友对我要求多，但是改过来不容易啊 ，常常会犯同样恶习。。。这算不算不守信用。。。
我的妈，快2个月才更新
Guest:2009-07-02 22:26 PM
是啊，好久没更新了。。。这么好的网站，我还以为快死了呢。。。
123:2009-07-02 22:43 PM
恩，我也是等了好久才看到新文章~~
呃、、驼背是我的恶习，正在改呢，经常受到他人的提醒，谢谢他们啦，哈。相信这个暑假会改掉的！！
这些其实都是心灵上恶习，已经不仅仅是身体外表上的了
心灵上的恶习不是比身体上的更恶劣么
妮子:2009-07-03 9:16 AM
青春期，会有这样恶习。人会成熟的，渐渐可以改掉。
天使教你如何克服这些，
魔鬼教你如何利用这些。
看你如何在最终的期待值里，游刃有余。
Guest:2009-07-03 10:47 AM
开始吧/让我们好好珍惜阳光明媚的夏天。 人生如戏易如梦，过了就过了，错了就错了。过好今天才是最现实。
shallee:2009-07-03 12:48 PM
其实我觉得，重点是针对事件本身而不是针对人，这样的话，即使表现的aggressive一点对方也不会过于难受，在私下的场合里还可以维持很好的关系。
海绵宝宝:2009-07-03 23:09 PM
这么好的网站，更新慢点没关系…
人有时需要率性而为，不要苛求
一步一步来，总会进步的。
孤独:2009-07-05 14:36 PM
我的天啊….你们都说我无奈了啊我占了十几种汗;;;汗无言啊
秋枫:2009-07-05 21:27 PM
两面性，世界上没有绝对的对与错，日三省吾身可也！
我最大的恶习就是和伟大的心理学8小时站长一样很龟毛地喜欢拖专集,拖”作业”,我知道”近我比较忙,应酬比较多,但这都不应该成为借口”,希望以后能改掉这个坏毛病,与时俱进,按时交作业,让一双双热切期待的眼睛失望!
很好…我很认同~！我也要加以改正
Guest:2009-07-06 21:48 PM
很喜欢这个网站 希望多更新
好久才有新东东看哦~~
erik:2009-07-07 10:05 AM
能发现自身的陋习就是进步，我会努力去改掉有的陋习。
麻烦你们更新快点，我会经常光顾
Ma:2009-07-08 13:42 PM
赞同安达的评论：这些其实都是心灵上恶习，已经不仅仅是身体外表上的了
Guest:2009-07-09 18:40 PM
不错
Guest:2009-07-10 15:24 PM
更新太慢了…….
我是黄伟:2009-07-11 2:24 AM
写的真好`！我有好多类似上边的恶习啊，谁能帮帮我呢`！广交
阿伤:2009-07-11 10:10 AM
我占有八条我心寒，可我想克制，谁能了解我，我无奈，我心灵这到门谁来帮我打开
啊三:2009-07-11 10:15 AM
我想走出心魔，希望上帝能帮我。
yolanda:2009-07-11 11:20 AM
我觉的好紧张，因为我有以上的大部分恶习。不过我是会好好改掉这些毛病的。相信自己！
我现在才发现我还有怎么多的恶习啊！我也改。让我变的更加的好
moonprint:2009-07-14 14:28 PM
我也是……原来自己在谈话时有这么多陋习啊……
当我说：真好，上面的恶习我一条都没的时候，那就危险了。呵呵
最后一条怎么说的。
Guest:2009-07-15 11:07 AM
点出了人类的劣根性，只要勇于承认，勇于改正，会成功的，同志们，加油！
诶偶:2009-07-15 11:09 AM
一针见血的点出了人类的劣根性！
布点:2009-07-15 21:31 PM
这些恶习我有好几个，平时和人交往时也发现了自己的这些毛病，但始终给自己找借口。当自己的年龄越来越大，意识到自己不再是可以任性下去的孩子了。
Guest:2009-07-17 10:09 AM
有这些恶习会让别人感到厌恶 是不是每个人都有这种恶习有没有人没有
Fuao.Lee:2009-07-17 16:07 PM
不够成熟，处理事情总不能游刃有余。
Fuao.Lee:2009-07-17 16:07 PM
期待更新！！
成人视频:2009-07-17 17:01 PM
可能是吧
蓝天白云:2009-07-17 19:03 PM
本人恶习不多，有时会感到空虚。
占了好几个~~我就是对自己要求高，虽然应很注意，但是还是会给周围的朋友亲人带来压力~~推荐大家可以坐坐乐嘉的色彩测试，黄颜色得分很高的人，相信都有这方面的问题。平和平和~~
小阙子:2009-07-19 16:00 PM
哎..我看那一半讲的全是我吗？
要改..
懒散者:2009-07-20 8:30 AM
懒散！
野初葵:2009-07-20 10:18 AM
我发现自己也或多或少的存在上面的恶习，只是在不经意间豆表现出来了，不知道刻意去改正能行不。
jczaza:2009-07-21 20:52 PM
先锻练锻练自己的觉察能力吧
Captain Ahab:2009-07-23 16:37 PM
we keep doing what we are until we are forced to change
更新慢不要紧 我也是三天打鱼两天晒网的 呵呵
网站最大的特点是 每隔一段时间 就会让我想起来 过来看看
收获很多 我也不时会推荐给身边的一些朋友 心理问题其实是比较普遍的
每个人 多多少少都会有一些
真心的感谢网站的创建者 让我们这些心理学或专业或业余的人有个好地方
可以学习和交流
我来说两句