Anorexia diary

Other people successfully lose weight, will be praise, a shrink? Me a little bit, however, it seems that everyone in preparation for my funeral, really very puzzled. They do not know, I am clear about the concept of healthy eating, but do not want to stop eating. I know I should be fat, but easier said than done. How others do not understand it! Perfume ads on my cut from a thin modeling photos, will produce weak and when to look, feel strong. Getting to know my mother's feelings. I am not saying to eat, but forget how to eat. I now 23 years old, think of the days of suffering from anorexia, as if it was other people's things. -psytopic.com


Patients with anorexia diary
VIC Cruz in schools are a model student, the United Kingdom HKCEE subjects score are excellent, but 16 years old suffering from anorexia, the parents let her leave. She recorded after their rehabilitation efforts.
Victoriacrooks oral CharlotteKemp author
February 2009


June 2001 28.6 kilograms

Mother suggested that I write down the feeling of eating - or should be said that the feelings do not eat anything. In her view, the diary can help me understand their feelings, understand why they sell骨立shape. Families and schools who want to know me a shrink? Stupid reasons, everyone seems to want to know, but I am in no position to answer.

This diary will not be able to be seen, if two brothers have been seen, not笑死strange. Who would have thought they Lingli cute, younger sister could behave anorexia - Yes, I am talking about anorexia.

"Anorexia," the words, mother and older sister Nina will only whispered, as if it was foul. At school, the students saw me, will phase as laughing; Teacher saw me, will be showing sympathy for the eyes. Everybody says that I am suffering from anorexia, I am even if it is suffering from anorexia.

Please do not think that I am used to fat, my body has always been slim, but I now no longer eat junk food. Other people successfully lose weight, will be praise, a shrink? Me a little bit, however, it seems that everyone in preparation for my funeral, really very puzzled.

August 19, 2001 26.4 kilograms

I went to see a doctor, is my mother insists on the go, by no means voluntary. I know my doctor will have to weight, Board before drinking two liters of water, but to no avail. Medical check-ups help me Doctor, I heard my stomach gurgling sound of water, so asked me to the toilet, I am not, on the mother weep欲泣ran. Doctor told mother that her daughter has already lost to "impede development" stage.

My mother tried every means to eat something, or pleading, or crying, or categorically ordered. She would make my previous favorite dish, a plate to calorie-rich food before me. I do not want her unhappy one will eat, and then hide the rest.

August 25, 2001 25.5 kilograms

Me every week to see a counselor. She told me to write some words on the association, as well as the "Lianliankan" to connect a number of things. She will also discuss with me the view of the quality of food; my diet is so instructors, nutritionists is also true. They do not know, I am clear about the concept of healthy eating, but do not want to stop eating. Those people seem to regard me as an idiot, I really hate! I know I should be fat, but easier said than done. How others do not understand it!

September 8, 2001 26.4 kilograms

Today, we see a doctor. This time my mother not to drink plenty of water completely. Out in front of me bending系鞋带, stroking my mother's back, a touch of a vertebra, can not help but scream out loud. She said my bones are thin chain protruding come, obviously malnourished.

Now with my parents always speak extremely sad. If I can press a button, the termination of this situation, do not know how good. My classmates said that "poor health", I do not blame them.

October 15, 2001 25.8 kilograms

To eat breakfast, my own clever way. Is earlier than the mother to get up in the plate and sprinkle some shredded biscuit crumbs, add point "remnants" of butter and jam, on a very decent. I will stand in the kitchen cooking some bread crumbs to stay until the mother down the stairs, I would pretend not to eat, to take more fruits and eat healthy.

October 27, 2001

My fingers and toes often feel tingling, body cold, but do not intend to tell the doctor, fearing that he admitted to my hospital with anorexia. Perfume ads on my cut from a thin modeling photos, will produce weak and when to look, feel strong. My waist is 51 cm, thigh, arm, leg, respectively, of the encircled are 23 cm, 9 cm, 18 cm.

November 1, 2001 28.2 kilograms

I tried to gain weight, I hope before Christmas, body weight increased at least 35 kilograms. Now eat three meals a day, but also to eat two snacks, intake of total calories was 1700 kcal. I am well aware of the variety of food calories.

November 20, 2001

An increase of 2 kilograms, doctors and mother are very happy, I am also pleased to put it. Way to go home, my mother forced me eating a piece of chocolate. Like this, I will soon become a big肥婆.

November 28, 2001 29.1 kilograms

And parents to join the party. Who do not believe I have 16 years of age, and all thought that I only have 10 years of age. Parents are crestfallen throughout the evening. Mother decided to let me leave until my turn for the better state of health so far.

December 5, 2001

My hair seems to像一团wire on the ball. Mother used to talk about how beautiful my hair, I do not want to eat something bad mood. 6 In a few months on my 17-year-old, but has yet to menstruation, have not been dating the opposite sex.

December 20, 2001

Mother found me with cold water shower, forced me out of a bathtub, holding dozens of large towel to muffle me. She seems to cry later, may also tell other people at home. I do not want to do, but I unable to extricate themselves.

January 5, 2002 30 kg

New house, new start. Mother said that if my body better, next year will be more than new school. Efforts are being made my weight gain, but to increase the half-kilogram not be easy, no matter what the body did not absorb.

February 10, 2002 31.8 kilograms

No longer a doctor. He advocated sending me go eating disorders clinic, but the mother refused to take care of my job to get the whole body. I still do not enjoy eating, but she gave me drink the milkshake, but also allow me to eat salad. I could not eat, she is no longer angry.

March 2002 30 kg

Getting to know my mother's feelings. I am not saying to eat, but forget how to eat. She and my long talk many times. Postprandial sometimes in my panic, her remarks will be the elimination of my worries. Mother also told people at home do not angry with me, because I do not want to go against them.

April 2002

Paint the whole day, reading books. I seldom go out, each time to go out and parents are together. Body weight is steadily increasing. This is good news.

May 20, 2002 33.2 kilograms

Parents encouraged me in May 22 over the age of 17 the other day, inviting friends to come home. What we have plans to eat. I still likes to do things for others to eat, this is my love of food reasons. Just to eat is not easy for me, I will strive to overcome difficulties.

July 2002

Sisters in my company to find a summer job, Sisters are the manager of an insurance company. My work, feel that they are the adults. I now have 35 kilograms, has attracted other people do not look strange. I am most pleased that received their salaries, they can go buy some pretty clothes.

September 2002

This is my new school the first week of the new schools are middle school girls. I now more health conscious, and even the thick soft hair.

I think other people are extroverted temperament, very interesting. No one knows me here suffering from anorexia, which makes me relieved. Now, I ask other people call me a "Dolly", are no longer permitted to say "small-dimensional" the.

October 2002

I am a mature girl, it felt really wonderful. I am a part-time job in a beauty salon, and her boyfriend have been dating a few times.

January 2003

I resumed a normal life as well as the body, great. Teacher advised me to apply for the University of Cambridge, but I hesitated, worried that too much pressure.

November 2004 50.9 kilograms

I entered college in Cambridge, studying philosophy Kerekou have a few weeks, and find it very comfortable. Campus has a lot of skinny girls, I often secretly began holding their own and their comparison. Sometimes I am a bit fat, it will call for advice to the mother.

June 2008 50.9 kilograms

I now 23 years old, think of the days of suffering from anorexia, as if it was other people's things. Build my own with confidence, is preparing to obtain a Cosmetology license therapists. I have my own house, also has a boyfriend. Our first date, he see my appetite is good, a bit puzzled. I have been reborn.

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